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True to Yourself
Spiritual Growth and Self-Mastery for Healers Who Know You Can't Pour from an Empty Cup
Real stories from spiritual teachers, therapists, healers and holistic coaches navigating their spiritual awakening journey while serving others. True to Yourself explores the honest path of awakening spiritually through conversations with fellow practitioners who understand that spiritual growth requires both self-mastery and boundaries in relationships.
Each episode features authentic stories and insights about balancing chakras, healing spiritually through shadow work, and developing the inner strength needed to serve from wholeness. You'll discover practical guidance from ancient wisdom including Ayurveda practices, Bhagavad Gita insights, and chakra healing techniques that help you stay true to yourself while supporting others.
From managing a dysregulated nervous system to embracing forgiveness of yourself and others, these conversations offer both spiritual counseling wisdom and life coaching insights for empaths and intuitive healers ready to awaken their inner guru. Whether you're experiencing spiritual awakening stages or seeking deeper spiritual healing, this show supports your journey with healing affirmations, self-care practices, and the spiritual meaning behind authentic service.
True to Yourself
028: From Emotional Numbness to Heart Chakra Healing with Cheryl Montanez
Struggling with emotional numbness or a closed heart chakra? In this powerful episode, Cheryl shares her journey from feeling emotionally numb to opening her heart chakra and rediscovering herself at 50.
After leaving a 22-year relationship, Cheryl spent years in emotional numbness, not realizing she needed to heal childhood trauma while helping everyone else. Learn the blocked heart chakra symptoms she experienced—going with the flow, people-pleasing and disconnection from her own desires.
Discover the heart chakra healing practices that transformed her life:
- Writing letters to release unspoken resentment
- The power of silence and morning rituals
- Recognizing symptoms of closed heart chakra
- Therapy for emotional healing through energy work
- How to open heart chakra through self-awareness
Cheryl reveals the opening of heart chakra symptoms she experienced—from crying for the first time in years to feeling joy in everyday moments. If you're experiencing blocked heart chakra symptoms or feeling emotional numbness, this episode offers practical steps for healing heart chakra wounds.
About Cheryl:
Cheryl Montanez is a multidimensional entrepreneur and creator dedicated to building a life of balance, purpose and growth. With a strong foundation in business and finance, she brings clarity and vision to projects across business management, property development, plan design and financial planning.
A graduate of The Ancient Way's Become the Hero of Your Own Journey program (https://theancientway.co/hero), Cheryl experienced profound transformation in her heart chakra and continues her journey in our Take Health Into Your Own Hands program (https://theancientway.co/health). A certified Emotion Code practitioner and Reiki Level 3 attuned healer, she blends modern wellness practices with timeless wisdom, helping others release emotional blocks, restore energetic harmony and embrace holistic well-being.
Rooted in creativity, spirituality and a love for the outdoors, Cheryl thrives on making—from designing tarot spreads and spiritual resources to preparing nourishing meals and strengthening her bow-hunting form.
Resources:
Begin with Wisdom: The Way of the Goddess Book
“I very highly recommend it... I think anyone can benefit from its wisdom." Dr. Deepak Chopra: a.co/crHf7Wm
Get Grounded: Free Living Liberated Newsletter
Rituals and inspiration to stay steady and radiant in your purpose: theancientway.kit.com
Know Yourself: Free Chakra Healing Guide
Discover where your energy flows and where it’s blocked with actionable insight: chakrahealingguide.com
Heal Your Gut: Free Digestion Healing Guide
theancientway.kit.com/digestive-healing
Give from a Full Cup: Circle of Life Community
Grow alongside fellow givers: theancientway.co/community
Journey Deeper: Book a Free Discovery Call
calendly.com/anantaripa/discovery-call
Disclaimer: Resources are for educational and spiritual growth purposes only and are not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Please consult your healthcare provider for medical conce...
Welcome back to the True to Yourself podcast. I am your host, Ananda Reepa Ajimera, and we are diving now into the power of love in your heart chakra. And I'm so happy to be joined here today by Cheryl Montanus. Cheryl is an amazing alumni of my Become the Hero of Your Own Journey program who has experienced a beautiful transformation in her heart chakra. So, Cheryl, I would love to know tell me about a time when you were truly true to yourself and what that did for your heart.
CherylMontanez:I mean, I think there's been a couple times in my life initially starting with leaving a 22-year relationship. Um to maybe at the time I wasn't like finding to find myself, but you know, to find to be on my own. It was been the first time in my whole entire life being on my own. I was a young mom. Um and just taking care of me, but it took about four years to really realize I still hadn't found me. Just leaving wasn't the trick. And um we stumbled into uh Mystic Energies um uh store, storefront, and they were doing some tarot card readings and different things, and then that I was drawn to that place, and that opened up my like spiritual journey that I started going on and realizing um that I hadn't um mourned, I guess the loss of like the family, like all the things that I had family-wise and connection-wise and people-wise, um, that weren't lost, but not the same. And you know, everything changes and becomes different. So I was slowly like, and I've never been one to be like, oh, I'm depressed or whatever. I don't feel so I just go like we've solved problems and we keep going. And um, in retrospect, I do feel like I was like getting like in a depression area, um, you know, just low energy, sat not happy, just there. And in that one night, and luckily it was a fast transition, like that night, and we started going to classes, and it was kind of like a self-help crying, putting things out there, um, realizing that I needed to find myself. And so it's been about a year and a half that I've just been focused on what do I like? Who what do I like to do instead of going with the flow? I think in our class we talked about one time where it was like, I thought I was so amazing because I'm easy, whatever you want to do, let's go. I can be, you know, fun anywhere, I can have fun anywhere because I'll do whatever anybody else, you know, wants to do within reason. Um, you know, I didn't have any of my own, like, oh, I don't like that or I don't want to do that. I would do anything. So those are good qualities, and I convinced myself of how great that was, but I also don't know what I like, what I do actually like, and what I want to do. So that's the journey that I've been on in finding those things. And funny, the things that I like are things that I've dipped my toe in throughout the years. I just never took the time to like do it because it was for me. I did the kids, I did the house, I did businesses, I did work and kept myself real busy taking care of everything else and numbing myself out.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Yeah, wow. So before the program, how did caring for others and your businesses and all the things that you talked about impact your own heart's ability to heal and feel love for yourself?
CherylMontanez:Just keeping myself busy so that I didn't have to, I didn't have the time. Like I went to a transcendental medica meditation class for one weekend and I really liked it. But it's a time commitment. And then and I think back then, because it's probably 15 years ago, it wasn't as people weren't as open, and I was worried about, you know, oh, now I'm gonna do this new weird thing that nobody else in my family or anybody around me does. Um and would people accept it or my family accept, you know, give me that space, and that it was easier just to get caught up in life again and get busy and stay busy and not really take care of myself and do those things. But it was my my spirit pulling me in those directions all the time. And yeah, so it's in looking back, I'm like, oh, I've always wanted it. I've always wanted to be here and and do these things and um just never never did and never looked into my own heart to say, like, yeah, it's okay to spend time for myself. Like I need we need that time. We need to take care of ourselves before, you know, help yourself before you help others. They always say, you know, put on your own oxygen mask. But I was really good at fixing up because I'm not emotional. I'm really good at solving your emotional problems with no emotions and being logical and analytical and dissect and help you through by being that calm, not get crazy and like tell you to hate somebody or not dislike somebody or like do something crazy. I'm very calm and rational. Like you should talk. Um, and great advice um that I don't take myself.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Yeah, that's big, I think, for a lot of us as healers, therapists, and coaches. And I feel like that's one of the most powerful things about my own journey. When I wrote this book, The Way of the Goddess, that the program is based on. I actually did it with the intention of really practicing what I was writing about and teaching to other people. And that for me has become such an anchor and such a transformational thing, actually, because as healers, I feel like we carry so much of that wisdom and what can happen when we actually apply it to ourselves is like wow, right? It's so amazing.
CherylMontanez:Right, right. Yes, just listening to your own desires and you know what's always been out there, but not with it, like not taking the time. So, like my morning kind of doing the rituals and practices or whatever and finding that quiet time actually really does center you and balance you and give you, and just not having anyone to talk to and not turning on the TV. Those were big little things that make a bit, you know, not I always used to think I had to have noise in the house, like have the TV on so that there's noise. I'm not listening, but there's distraction. So that was one of the things in the class that we like the silence and letting go of the noise and having that time, and um and that made me realize that's what I really love about my morning. It is dead quiet because I'm trying to be quiet, not so I get more time so I don't wake anybody up.
AnantaRipaAjmera:I love that. Can you share about a moment when you realized it was safe to open your heart to your own needs, desires, and feelings? I think a lot of people feel afraid to do this and they run from themselves as a result. So what what would you say was your experience with this?
CherylMontanez:I think it was going to the class and having that reading and crying in front, like I don't cry and then reading two cards, like and called me out on my whole life in two cards and never meeting that person before, and then crying in front of like eight people that I had never met, and just realizing like how does she know that? First of all, like wow, so this is real, this is like what I'm need to hear, and um and that slowly just kind of crack, I guess it cracked me, you say a crack in the open. It kind of cracked me that that day, and um made me realize like no, I need like because I'm burning out or I'm getting, you know, I'm not someone that I would would have thought that I was depressed or sad, but I really was like I was just lost. I was whatever, just going with the flow, getting through day by day, and realized like that's not a way to live life. There's so much more for my life, you know, and I'm 51, so turning 50 was like, oh, because so all this happened like right at like 50-ish, 4950. So I think there's a lot of that, like, oh my gosh, you know, but then I'm like, oh, I have the then Sally's in our class, and I'm like, I have a whole lifetime ahead, and you know, we can make a choice today to do something different, and the making a choice for yourself is gonna better you and everyone around you. Like, I just the differences with you know, my children, my grandchildren, um having these deeper conversations because everything was like, oh, problem this, problem that, and like solving this, and now we're talking more on a spiritual level or like um healing our emotions and healing our hearts and you know, feeling our feelings and talking about those kind of things. And my granddaughter's 12, and I'm trying to have like help her deal with the emotions, you know, as a teenager and have make better choices and just have a better connection to herself. So that's super exciting, and and watching that, the little changes that I've seen already. And I'm like, this is working, this is amazing. And if she can from 12 start this way, and my daughter's in her 30s, like I'm like, just do it, take care of you.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Oh, I love that. That's so beautiful. That's so amazing. The ripple effect that we can have in our families just by really committing to doing some small things that support us that we become what we want our children and grandchildren to be, right? Instead of just saying, you do this, you do this, while I go do this, right? Right.
CherylMontanez:Yeah, talking about what we all should do.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Right. Like so much of what happens as as leaders, right? Whether parents or teachers or coaches or healers or podcast hosts, even it's like easy to just say what the other person should do. It's much more difficult, I think, to actually walk that path ourselves. And yet I feel like that's the key, right, to leadership, to really good parenting, to planting the seeds that you actually want to grow in other people is that you actually live that life yourself. And then a lot of that conflict goes away, right? Of like what you want them to do, and then they see the power of it through your example rather than you know, just like exhausting your energy trying to explain it and and you know, have people do that. What kind of resistances arose as you began moving from feeling emotionally numb to really awakening your heart?
CherylMontanez:Well, I've always been um a proponent of, well, I'd rather be this way and numb than emotionally out of control, right? Like I've never seen like the positive in that meltdown or um the world is on fire and everything is horrible. And then I even say the same, like we're both living the same world in the same life in the same world, right? Everything around us is the same, and how you're dealing with it and how I'm dealing with it, like is two totally different ways. Like mine is more of a level and yours is more of a you know, up and down or um chaotic, but we're still getting the same result. So we could take the hard road, we could take the easy road, but there is a level of putting people off that way too. Like I think that not being able to be open um and as emotional, like also pushes people away. So it's trying to find the balance of not being overly emotional, let like the world come crashing down on me, but also understanding and feeling and um embracing the emotions as they come, recognizing them. I mean, my first steps are just even recognizing that um there's more emotions than frustrated or angry and calm and saying I love you, you know what I mean, and and feeling I love you, you know, and having those differences. So like I think just starting to recognize my own feelings in the moment, especially in stressful moments, and trying to then not react, you know, have a conscious thought. Um, but yeah, it is identifying feelings first.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Yeah, yeah, I remember when we talked about uh this equation, uh, or two equations actually in our program when we were exploring the heart chakra that Swami Parthasarti reveals and what your you know reflections were on it, because he says love plus selfishness equals attachment. Attachment minus selfishness equals true love. And I remember you had said that you were the kind of person who would always say, I love you, I love you. And this actually caused you to pause and reflect, hey, what is love actually?
CherylMontanez:Right. Yeah, I did pause and reflect to see it like have I actually ever been in love? So my family never said I love you or gave hugs, like we weren't that type of family. It was a tumultuous, you know, fighting and then just normal, or fighting and then just normal. Um, but as I had I had my daughter at 18, and when she was two or three, you know, or probably older than that, maybe five or six, but where you're starting to like time out and you know, your behavior, like disciplining and whatever, it one day just dawned on me, like, you know what? I never I was following those same habits. I she was getting in trouble. And again, me, I'm not emotional, so it was just nope, black and white, you break the rules and da-da-da, and whatever. And you're in there crying and having your thing. And um, I realized I needed to make sure that I said I love you and that you know um that you're loved. I love you, but you're still gonna be in timeout for 20 minutes. Yeah. Um, and also I had stepchildren, so I knew it was important. I don't know how I knew, but it was just um given to me that it was very important to make sure that they knew I loved them before um any discipline came from me. So initially I never disciplined, you know, I just talked to them and whatever and let their parents just do that kind of thing. So to establish that love. My dad adopted my brothers, and so there, I was that kind of family anyway. And I think that's probably where that came from. So as a step parent, you need to like love first, and then um, you know, then you can have your comments or discipline or whatever. So that came years later. So I think that was kind of during that time, and it was part of that. Then I started saying the words, you know, I love you, and saying it all the time. Like, so now my family is all trained. When we get off the phone, it's I love you, like my daughter's best friends, like we all say I love you. Um, but the men in my life have always been like, oh, use that like throwaway. So I think I did go full from none at all to okay, everybody needs to know that they're loved because I never heard that. I remember one day saying it to my mom on the phone because it became a habit. And when I was saying goodbye to my mom, I was like, hey, love you, bye. And then she gives and didn't know what to say because our family didn't say it. And I hung up and laughed because I was like, oh, I didn't even mean to say it to her because I knew it would throw her off. Um, but then I just started, you know, the best way through it is just to keep doing it. So I trained my mom and my dad and my kids to say it. And so when you said that the equation, um, it did make me think of my relationships and that, huh? I want there's always been attachment in all of my relationships. So you do businesses together and you know, the kids and stepkids and whatever. So there's always becomes the things. And I don't know that I've ever had true love because it's always been a rational, logical, not you know, not so much of an emotional um decision making. I mean, there's some emotions obviously to get you there, but then it was like, oh, move in together because it makes more sense to not pay two rents. Um, you know what it was always logic that brought it to whatever, you know, next step, next step, and probably sooner than necessary because I learned a lot in our class. And I'm like, wow, I think it's amazing the way that you go through your relationships and and are doing that. I love hearing about it. Um, but yeah, that there's the balance and like having that being trained to say I love you versus feeling those feelings of I love you and how um the attachment, like even with our kids, you know, we love them because they're our kids, you know, and so and there is that's a huge attachment. Um, you know, and would it be there without? And I do know, I do love all my kids and I would still be in their lives. Um, but yeah, the attachment thing was kind of profound and made me have to think that makes you kind of sad.
AnantaRipaAjmera:It it does because it makes us reflect like what kind of expectations are coming with that love, what kind of desires do we have for what the person should be doing? Where is that you know, manipulation and control potentially also even coming into the love, right? Like with codependency, I feel like it's so much of that where it's like we we can do things for people, but there's always this kind of expectation that something is uh going to happen as a result of it. And when we start to examine those desires and expectations and really consciously release them, it allows so much more space, I think, for the true love to really blossom. Because when we don't uh have those desires, right? Like that's uh kind of what the selfishness is. It's not about what you do or don't do, because you can do all the things, right? And more things for someone, but still very much have attachments and expectations for what they will, or entitlements rather, right? Like entitlement and expectations for what they should do as a result of what you're doing. And when we can just feel the attachment without any of the extra stuff, right, that goes with it, it's so beautiful to have that love just get purified, right? And be really like the real true thing.
CherylMontanez:Right. And I think that at the beginning of relationships, that that's the trick, right? Because it feels like that. You're like meeting people and talking and all you whatever you say and everything's funny, you know what I mean? And all of our like resistances are down, and it's crazy how quick, like one little thing. Um, you know, as the dynamic starts to change, then you're like, huh. Whereas if yes, you so it's just because at the beginning, it's not that we're fake, but it's just that we're so much more open. And and then we slowly start to learn, like people's like, oh, that didn't go over well. So let me not, you know, and we start adjusting. So it's noticing that. And um, and that's one big thing that I've done over this during this course and um the course of the last year and a half of just going through this is noticing who are attacked. Like, I've kind of gotten rid of, I'm like, we're not really friends. Like, I do business with you and we go to dinner, but that it's not like a friendship, like you don't call to see if I'm okay, or uh you know, it's just because we I provide a service and let me see if I don't do dinner, you know what I mean? And and it's changed some relationships, but it's okay. It's also like a negative, you know, person that I'm always trying to fix or help, like not see things that way. And I'm like, yeah, I don't need to spend my energy doing that. So I mean, outside of you know, relationships, romantic relationships, just in in life, evaluating that differently has really opened my eyes. Yeah, giving me back some of my own time for me.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Totally, totally, yeah. Yeah, so how has embracing more of your own self-love changed your relationships, would you say, with others? You you shared a little bit about it, but is there any other way?
CherylMontanez:Yeah, the um I think I realized I have way, you know, a lot of the things that I do is energy work, right? With Reiki and Emotion Code. Um, so one of the things that I started realizing the more I'm learning about energy and how it works and like attracts like, which is said all the time in Ayurveda, right? So emotions too. If you worry, and I again feel like I'm just a calm baseline person. I don't worry about things and I do inside my head. I'm going, oh, they're gonna react like this. Let me try to massage it because I don't want emotional reactions from people. I want everybody to just stay happy and be calm and continue doing what we're doing on the path. And so I start manipulating how I'm presenting things and worrying about it. And what I realize is that's just sucking. If somebody has that energy on the surface, I am just sucking it right. But as soon as I worry about it, I'm just sucking it right out of them and into me. So I really started just saying, I just have love and gratitude in my heart. I'm filling this car with love and gratitude. Like if I know someone's getting in that already is like frustrated or whatever, and I'm just like filling the car with love and gratitude and filling my space. And it's wild how much that works. And then, and so I tend to say, like, it's me. And then people are, you know, your friends and people around you are like, no, it's not, you know, this isn't okay, and that's not okay, and people can't act like that. I go, I get it, the behavior is not right from the other person, but we have so much more control than we realize, and I'm realizing it more and more, and like it's always eye-opening and amazing as those little things, you know, this I because I noticed when I stopped doing it, and I'm like, Oh, I need to go back to, you know, reaffirming just love and gratitude in my heart, and um kind of pulling that out of people and you know, walking around the grocery store with a smile on my face and making eye contact with people. Because one of the one something that I realized when I did come back around and started feeling happier or really being happier. Um, when I would go to the grocery store or the store wherever, I people would always be like, Oh, hi, like just give me a random, you know, people would just start talking to me, but it's because my eyes were up and my face, like I really did have some joy in me, you know? And as I was in that little bit of a depressed time, I was like, Yeah, nobody even talks to me anymore when I'm in a store, like I must be getting old or blah, blah, blah. Don't, you know, I don't look. And I realized, no, it's my whole energy. I wasn't attracting people the way that I was, has nothing to do with appearance and everything to do with, you know, me looking up, smiling, and feeling good. And then people would just want to be like, hey, and me, and I would initiate too. I if I make eye contact with you, I'll say hi and just give that extra niceness to somebody that needed, or if it looks like they needed a hug from a not that I hug strangers, but you know, like just the to say the hi and you know, give somebody some attention that they weren't expecting, you know, randomly. So yeah, I did, and then once I kind of perked out of it, I was like, oh, see, there it is there, and that's that natural. Then I thought it was me and just the look on my face, but now I realize it's the energy that I'm generating and putting out and what and I'm attracting negativity to myself. So we fulfill our own prophecies. All the things and wives' tales and sayings are there for a reason. They're all true.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Totally, totally. I love that. And that's really the pure love, right? Coming through because when you're just radiating that joy and kindness to people without expecting anything from them to do, you know, that's when the real love has a chance to blossom and to be there first in our heart, right? For ourselves. Because we often abandon ourselves, right? We neglect ourselves into helping other people, and especially those of us who are even healers by our our you know, uh our calling, we can get really sucked into that and totally forget about ourselves in the process and get rewarded for it in different ways. But then we ultimately pay a price at some point, right? And we all have to do that reckoning and reflection within ourselves. And so, what what practices or insights from the become the hero of your own journey program would you say specifically helped you to reconnect with the power of your own heart?
CherylMontanez:So the most profound um I would have to say was the silence. Um when we did that chapter, and um, you know, you recommended a whole day of silence, and I was like, whoo, I got my two hours in the morning, like you know, that's and I felt good about it. I was like, yeah, that's when I think it started really layering in that my morning routine has really given me some balance. And I didn't realize I had such a good one, like until talking to everyone. And I mean, I'm just analytical, so I have an Excel spreadsheet checklist to try to track it, plus you know, all the vitamin, all the things I'm trying to track. So um, but I have this ritual and I felt good about it, but I was like, wow, I don't know if I could do a whole day. And um, we went hunting in the woods, my first hunt, and I sat in a blind by myself for 16 hours. Um, and you can't make a sound and you can't do anything. And um I sent some reiki energy out into the woods and I did some meditation and some healings and whatever. I called in a ton of animals, like um, so I saw all kinds of wildlife in a beautiful thing. And you don't have technology, you have your phone, but reception is sketchy, and then the phone's gonna die, and I needed to hike my way back out because I would get lost. So I had to reserve my batteries. Um, and one day after that class, I think it was the second hunt, um my phone didn't charge at night. So by 11 o'clock, I didn't have any battery. And I was like, huh, because I've been reading a book or doing some emotion codes. And I, what am I gonna do? I didn't bring the hardback book this time, and but I had brought my notebook from class. So I said, let me go through and do any homework that I didn't do, or any of the um practices that you know we pick, we could pick one or whatever, and there were three or four. So I had gone back, and one of those was writing a letter. Um it was unspoken resentment. Um, also writing a letter to myself, writing a letter to my emotions, um, and writing letters. To someone that there was a resentment, or we made a list of people. So I did write the letter to myself. Um, that invoked a few tears, and it was amazing with the free writing, it does start coming. And I'm not a writer when I journal it's today. I did so this one writing a letter to myself. I had one other time done it before, so a little bit of practice um months and months ago. So that one was a little bit easier writing a letter to my emotions, and I think the instructions were to talk about how it had served me, um, and then how it no longer serves me and how I want to move past it. So that was really cool. So this is all kind of leading up to then the name was like, check, okay, got that done, check, got that done. Okay, the next one is resentment. And I had made a list of you know, my ex-husband, um different people on the list that I thought that's who in the moment, those were the ones that popped to my mind. And my mom and dad were on there, but they were lower on the list. And I was like, you know what? I'm gonna write to I wrote to my dad, I think, my father first, and then my mom, and I was sitting in there just tears running down my face. Um, it was the middle of the day, so I really wasn't too worried about animals coming in because they were all bedded, but I was just going to town and crying and kind of feeling it, and at the same time stopping and noticing, like, huh, I really needed to get these out. And I it's things that I thought, but I never said it in that manner of saying it to them through a letter. Like, like I'm really saying this to you. I've always excused, not excuse the behavior, but justified or however you want to say, you know, like, oh, there I always look at your upbringing and your traumas that you've gone through. We've all gone through traumas, so like we're all here in a different way, and no one's out there going, I want to hurt people. It's just it happens, and I don't want to intend on hurting people, but it I hurt people. So I kind of give everybody that grace. And of course, I've explained away bad parenting and all of that, all of our upbringing, um, to be able to not hate my parents for it or be resentful and all that kind of thing. So yeah, I actually said those things in a different way for the first time and bawling, crying out in the middle, nowhere thinking I'm by myself and then hearing footsteps and like, oh, I'm supposed to be hunting. There's an animal coming, and it wasn't an animal, it was strangers, and they walked up, and I probably had the girl was like, hi, but thankfully in hunting, you don't stay in chat. You're like, oh, sorry, I intruded on your space, and you move away. But I just and it made me giggle, so it was a nice like um way to pull out and um kind of recap of where I was, but it was great, and I intend to finish writing letters to all the rest of the people just to kind of release it and and say the things that we don't say because we don't want to hurt people's feelings. And some I don't think it needs to be actually said. There's nothing, it's all stuff from the past, right? Like there's no changing it. Um, and I've always said I'm who I am for all the things that I've been through. I don't remember them, but probably because they're traumatic, but it's my superpower of you know, not remembering. Um, but I am who I am because of all those things, because of all the scars and all of the things that have made me who I am, and I'm happy with who I am. So that's all I can ask for, and it's fine. Um, and I'm not trying to place blame, you know, if those things hadn't happened, I might be a totally different person, but right not without problem. You know, it would just be a different. So I am okay with who I am and and where I made it to. And it's just exciting to be kind of letting some of that stuff go that I didn't even realize I was holding on to. And that's where motion code and Reiki and all of that, like releasing those energies because it's just attracting those same emotions on that same level. Like I was attracting that somehow, you know, by keeping all of those things inside me. So yeah, the silence was that was probably the best release, the best hunting trip ever. And I didn't get anything.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Well, the whole purpose of the journey is that we defeat the inner demons. So you hunted your own inner demons, right? And that's the best thing you can possibly do. I love that. Yeah, that's a really powerful practice. And for someone who is feeling so numb to then be bawling, like you mentioned you were, I think that was a big, big transformation in your journey and it really does cleanse and release so much. I I found a lot of benefit in doing that myself for sure with multiple people. And I think it's a really good practice to do anytime we are feeling kind of full of emotions that we don't know what to do with. And the whole purpose of it is, like you said, not to send into that person, but just to clear it out of our own aura or our own energetic field. So, Cheryl, if you could speak to the younger Cheryl, one who may have closed off her heart to protect herselves and just be, you know, even keeled and go with the flow of what everyone else wants. What would you say to her now from the perspective that you have now at 51 with the kind of journey you've been on?
CherylMontanez:But I understand probably why the shields were put up. Um but to do your best to hold on to to yourself, like not to lose that inner child or just the who you are, because I I think it started really, you know, far back um as a child, just being, you know, the last kid, you know, we all have the with the middle child and the oldest child, all the the things and the studies, and you know, we know. And so I'm the oops kid that you had way later, and I'm sure there was resentments and all of those kind of things. And even with learning with emotion code, like absorbing whatever emotions my mom was going through when you didn't mean to get pregnant at 30 with the man that you probably weren't in love with anymore, uh, you know, and all of those things. So I was born into that. And I was born kind of like a wallflower, kind of just, you know, my I think my next youngest brother was nine years older than me. So there's a big gap. Um, a lot of great things came with that because then I was like when I was old enough, I was the cute little kid to take around with them and attract girls for the boys, you know, and and so there's some like there's the good and the bad. But I think I for the most part, I was just um yeah, like over there, you know, not um not to be seen or heard, or you know, just try to stay off the radar and stay out of the way. Um, and that probably started building that. So if I could be a bigger personality, or you know what I mean, like hold find myself and and be that person and and kind of hold on to that would probably be just so that I knew there was a little bit of me left once I got here to find because it's hard to find. I don't know. I was so I think I was so long that way that I really don't know what kind and without the memories, I don't know what kind of kid I really was or what you know. I mean, I was a tomboy, I do know that we played with guns and did that kind of stuff. So I mean it wasn't all horrible, but um yeah, maybe that's why I hunt now because I was a tomboy then, so it came through. I did hold on to a little bit of it.
AnantaRipaAjmera:You do deep hunting, you know, you hunt for the hidden emotions, yes, your wisdom, you hunt down your demons, so it's the best kind of hunting there could be.
CherylMontanez:Right, yeah, and I've been doing that, yes.
AnantaRipaAjmera:And what would you say now it feels like to love yourself more fully than ever before, even amidst challenges or uncertainty?
CherylMontanez:It is freeing. Um, I would say like it gives me a new look on life of there's a lot more life, and every day, like I can be something different, I can choose something different, and nothing's nothing's stuck, nothing is like who cares whatever the past has been, and I can change if I'm not happy and something um I can make you know that change, not that I'm rationally, you know, or irrationally going crazy making changes, but noticing if I don't like it, okay, that what can I do about it? Let me like change this or change that. Um and it's okay. It's like there's a lot of life left, and there even though I'm just now getting into this, and I do feel like it was probably my life's work what I should have been doing from a long time ago, we're here now. And and that's okay. It's okay to be where you're at. And we all get there. And it's exciting, it makes it exciting.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Totally, totally. And you know, in the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna says that no effort on the spiritual path ever goes to waste. No matter when we start this journey, how late it may feel in the life cycle, it's really we believe in reincarnation, so it's just the beginning, then upsetting the to uh create the next one, right? To start exactly where you leave off in this uh chapter. And you mentioned about Sally. Sally is our amazing 82-year-old um program member, community member of the ancient way, the circle of life. And she was a part of the heroes journey with Cheryl. And um, I'm gonna have her on the podcast as well, share about her powerful journey. But she is such a living inspiration of that, right? That you know, at 82, she's still learning so much and still discovering so much. She just got back from a big epic trip to Europe. And, you know, like life only stops once we stop learning and stop growing. And so the whole purpose or the whole, you know, practice of really being in your heart, being open to life is, I feel what keeps us young also forever.
CherylMontanez:Yes, and the knowing that I'm preparing for my next life is kind of amazing, right? And gives you that it doesn't matter because whatever I can do here just makes the next life that much more amazing. And and uh, you know, it's all for a purpose and a reason and um and looking into those past lives of like what the heck was going on, it helps explain, right?
AnantaRipaAjmera:Yeah, what's going on in the present, but but all that matters is the story that we tell here and now, right?
CherylMontanez:Yes, and yeah, and exploring just finding you and finding what you're calling and what you naturally have within you to that makes you you, that makes you on your journey. That's what's exciting. So I do find and it's funny, like I said, like things that I'm like, oh, this is a whole new me, but it's not. There's been such little sprinkles of this throughout my whole life. I love Deepak Chopra. The first time I ever seen him on Oprah, I was like, wow, I love that. And it totally let when I re-found Ayurveda, I was like, oh, this is what I never remembered how to say Ayurveda. So I was like, whatever Deepak Chopra is into, and you know, is what really interests me, but I never, you know, went down the road. It seemed so overwhelming. So, but once you start, you know, one bite at a time, like Tara's book would be an amazing book for anyone to like step into it slowly. Um, but yeah, it is it, it isn't big things, it's a lot of little things and understanding that all these little things add up. And I just love the ancient wisdom and you know, nothing Western. Let me come back to what everybody did back then before it was real political and it was just natural in nature. Um, and it makes so much sense. And I love that science is proving all of it, like you know, with the energy, with the emotion code, with Ayurveda, our modern science is proving that all of these practices and all of these things are real and why they work. So, for my analytical mind, it so helps to go, ah, that's why like attracts like, you know, it is like there is actual scientific knowledge that we have that proves it. So it makes it so much easier to, you're not just grasping at some unknown, or I've had a lot of trouble with faith, just having faith, because I don't think everything, you know, family-wise, having a rough family doesn't give you that faith, that stay stable foundation to be like, I can trust this. There hasn't been a lot of trust. Um, it's been all manipulation and and craziness. So that I'm very science-y and like to have the science behind things. So my journey started with taking a natural path. I just want to know how my body works so I can figure it out myself and know what I need to take and how to be better. And it's you know, journeyed into all of this, but yeah, it makes sense. Um, scientifically, you know, emotionally, spiritually, it's opened me up to be allow myself to be spiritual and you know, not have to grasp a religion. But I did read a book on you know the Bhagavad Vita and was like, oh, that makes so much sense. Why is it just not screamed, you know, like it's so open to everybody. It's the path. One path leads to all, like to the one, you know, the same. All the paths go to the same place. We're all, and I've always kind of believed that that's why I don't like religion, man-made religion. I always say don't like man-made religion, because everybody has to be so right and their thing, and then there's already a book out there that says like, no, it's all the same, and it all leads to the same place. We're all doing the same thing, and I'm like, I didn't know that existed. So that's amazing, and it makes it so much easier to, you know, some basic principles and be kind, and all the things that religion teaches are great, you know. Um, it's just the judgy part that I try to stay away from.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Totally, totally. Yeah, that's what's so cool about Hinduism, that as a quote unquote religion, it's actually the ultimate spiritual system, which is saying that all paths lead to the same truth. And when we have that love of truth in our hearts, then God also is here in our hearts. And who is to say that one version of God is better or greater than another? They're all representing the same one universal God or divine consciousness, which connects us all together in a beautiful way. And I love also about how Ayurveda, the world's oldest healing system that Deepaktopra has introduced beautifully to the world. And I got to thank him for doing that in person. He you know has has brought that forward. And now a lot of us are knowing about that. And I love how it gives us these uh scientific principles, which are really rooted in the laws of physics to be able to understand the order in the chaos and to really know why we're doing what we're doing. I was just actually speaking with an Indian American uh woman prior to us coming on for our interview, and she was exactly sharing these things with me that, you know, even though I grew up Hindu, it was so religious. Like people just do stuff, and I didn't know why we had to do this and why we were being prescribed so many things. So even within this system, I would have a lot of confusion because they just don't understand the real essence behind it. And if we all have understood the essence behind any religious or spiritual tradition, they're all very pure. They're all saying, you know, to be an ethical person, to do good for others, to do good for ourselves, to keep God with us in our hearts. You know that we don't even have to go to a religious institution to find God, because that's actually what lives inside of our own heart. And that's why even in Islam, it's all about slaying the inner demons, right? To be able to discover your own true self. And I love that we had a Muslim woman as a part of our cohort and how she connected with it too, as part of her own kind of connection, along with what she believes in Islam as a practicing Muslim. And so yeah, like these are just universal principles that anyone and everyone should be able to embody to live a happy and healthy life. And I'm so excited that you're gonna be joining our eight-week Take Health into your hands program starting up next week. That's gonna be a wonderful journey to incorporate these wellness practices and be able to.
CherylMontanez:I've had the book and I was like, did I read it and go through it? And I hadn't. Um, I fell in love with the first one and then bought everything, you know, bought it, went and looked for what else you had and realized this one isn't on um the audio, you know, it's on an audio book. So I mostly listen and I was like, that's why. So I never actually sat. So I'm actually kind of glad because I'll go through it in the class and so it'll all be more fresh and um going through it. But yes, I'm very excited to kind of get the rest of the rituals and practices and figure out my long-term practices and um eating and the digestion and hormone balancing. I mean, that's kind of been this all started just like on a health journey as well, but turned into a spiritual journey. But obviously, it all is one thing. You have to have all the balance and everything. So yeah, so slowly just pulling all the pieces together and trying to learn to juggle.
AnantaRipaAjmera:I love it, I love it. Yeah, you know, actually, Cheryl, the IRV the way book that you just showed, that was my first book that came and The Way of the Goddess was the second. So yeah, this was my my own kind of beginning of my journey. And then it deepened into the spiritual aspects and understanding. But I think the IRV the way just gives such a great foundation that I still am excited to go back through myself. Like, okay, what am I telling others? I I've now created the space as someone who tells other people ideas and practices what to do that I gotta listen to what I'm saying and I have to take time to incorporate it as well, you know. So I feel like I go through these programs that I teach also as a student, and it makes it much richer to be able to do it that way, you know, and I'm I'm just so excited to have you as a part of that. And so, how do you continue to nurture and protect your heart as you move through daily life? I'm sure we'll have to do another episode after you finish that program, but you know, as of right now, what what are those practices that anchor you?
CherylMontanez:Um, the silence I think is like been the most impactful. Um, having my morning, like I didn't even realize it how impactful, but just that morning time of getting up early before anyone else, making my teas. I sit outside in the sun, um, do my gratitude journal. Um, you know, like it's the layering. I also listen to Gary Brecca, so I'm like trying to layer in all the, you know, the health stuff as well, but um, you know, the Sarcadian rhythm, but it all ties into back to Ayurveda as well with you know, sleep ritual. Actually, that's been a big one, like making sure you go to sleep at the same time and getting up at the same time, trying to get the seven to eight hours um and just incorporating that. But my what I'm really working on right now is trying to slow down. I think you and I talked about it at the beginning, like I can talk and I'll just talk and say all the things that are floating around in my brain without like really pulling them together. That's why I was nervous about this. Um being able to really like think and have a fluid thought um and not just say things because I tend to talk while I'm thinking, and then that just maybe I don't even mean the I'm just thinking it through and I lose, you know, the people around. So I think quietly like going inside, being quiet, um and identifying those emotions that I am feeling, like okay, and trying to identify if that's a trigger. I got a reading and I uh was she said that um past relationship, you know, has made me guarded and different things um that I bring into this relationship. So I do tend to I do recognize, you know, things from my childhood are triggers that other people have, like, oh, that's like triggering me because of my dad. Um, but also just trying to catch that and feel it all the way through because of the emotion code. I want to like not stop, not stuff down emotions. I want to process them all the way. So really kind of grabbing it and like, okay, I'm frustrated and I want to stop and think about it. Why am I frustrated? And um, because have you ever been in a situation where you see a couple like bicker and you're like, that really wasn't that big of a thing that that person said? Like, why are they so frustrated? But it is all that built up animosity in things, right? So I'm trying to see that in myself and go, okay, whatever just got said was not even that big of a deal. They're trying to be funny, let them be funny, you know, and like what did that really trigger? What emotion can I release right now? And like that to get them out of there. So yeah, that's kind of been the the focus is relax and be calm and try to feel the emotion all the way through and and also identify as like what it where it really is coming from. Because I think at this time in my life, everything is just a trigger of something. You know, we're so built and designed to protect ourselves from all the things. So, oh, there's little roadblocks. So, like we start making our own roadblocks in our life and um just trying to like crash those down and say, nope, it's okay. It's okay that I feel this way, it's okay that you feel this way, and finding boundaries. That's like probably the next learning how to speak my truths with boundaries and and finding how to set those boundaries.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Yeah, yeah, wow. I mean, in IRV that we talk about how digestion is considered the key to overall health, and that it's not just of food. We have to digest our emotions, we have to digest our life's experiences, and that's so much of where disease uh gets uh anchored into the body andor the mind, right? It could be that the body is okay, but the mind has just got a lot of disturbance that may have gotten deeply buried under the needs of other people and constantly responding to them instead of allowing ourselves to just feel pain, to feel a discomfort, to feel sadness, to feel anger, to feel loneliness or frustration, like all the human range of emotions. Because once we allow that digestion to happen, the understanding of what the past has caused us to do in the present, then the awareness itself also allows us as a base to make a new choice. And when we are living fully in the now, right, we are having the most power to be able to enjoy life and to unwrap the gift of each present moment. So that's really what where all of this uh leads us to. And I am just so happy that you're joining on for more journeys and we have our circle of life community also to continue this process of digestion in community. We had our first uh medicinal storytelling circle on Saturday, and it was so amazing to have people of all ages, all stages, all walks of life come together to share from all over the world about what we've overcome in our lives and what was it that allowed us to overcome those challenges because we can then understand in each other's stories, even what we're going through now is the beginning of something beautiful to come. In the Book of Agita, Krishna has says that what is like poison in the beginning becomes like nectar in the end, and what's like nectar in the beginning becomes like a poison in the end. So rather than just putting aside the poison to choose the nectar, we can see through the stories how the challenges and the poison when we go through it and we take it in and we move through that, allow us to experience the nectar in the end and how then we become more brave to take on each challenge and really uh feel our emotions, right? Instead of running away from them. And I feel like we do that better when we do it together and know that other people are on this journey as well. So you'll have that space also to continue to process and continue to share. And we keep going through the same um nine chakra theme each time. So I think when the heart chakra comes in, you know, we'll have you open the circle and share your story and we'll we'll share the podcast with people as well. And it's just a way that we keep ourselves anchored in our heroes' journey as we keep on growing and evolving, and that way we also stay connected, you know, to each other in this heartfelt way, which uh is just so nice to know that there's other warriors of the spirit out there who are doing this together. Um, and this has been so amazing to talk to you. And before we we close, I want to just ask what advice would you give, Cheryl, to someone who feels disconnected from their heart or the power of love within themselves.
CherylMontanez:I think what you were just saying, though, as you were saying it, I realized in this group I learned a lot more than I expected. Um, unexpected things. Um, I don't have a lot of ailments and and physical issues. And like, you know, your checklist was like, what is your butt? And I'm like, yeah, I don't have any of that. Like, so I'm so grateful to that, but that doesn't mean, you know, it is mine's more mental. My my mind is, you know, full. But it it allowed in talking to people and hearing everyone else's stories and kind of being there, it does make you feel like, okay, well, one, I'm not alone. There are like people going through this, like even with Tara, with, you know, oh, she's, you know, becoming a practitioner. And it's been about five years, like you're able to see that everybody's going through it, no matter what age. Um, and we're all on like the same journey differently. And um, so I think it is my advice would be to get a group of like-minded people, find your people, find your tribe. Um, you know, us walking into that store that day opened up my my world to a whole nother tribe, which led me here. And, you know, I'm being part of the circle. And um, I missed Saturday, but I'm trying to get to all of them. I was in all the others. Um, but yeah, that's like you just get so much insight from hearing other people like dealing with the same things. And um, and it's just nice like to talk about like our group was very small, like the five of us, four of us, five of us. Um so we all had enough time to talk, you know, we kind of somebody had something come up, so we were able to like, you know, coach each other through it. So I just think, yeah, finding something like this is. Amazing.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Oh, thank you so much, Cheryl. This has been so wonderful to connect with you. And I know that your journey of opening your heart and finding the love within yourself is going to touch so many people's hearts. And I just want to invite anyone who's listening to check out the show notes for all the links to check out the programs that we offer about taking health into your own hands, becoming the hero of your own journey. And if you don't know where you want to start, then the Circle of Life community is a wonderful place because we have a free membership tier where you can join us live three times a month to just share medicinal healing stories from your heart and connect with the hearts of others from all over the world. And it's an ongoing platform for anyone who's wanting to or committed to helping others to grow in some way, whether you're a healer, a coach, a therapist, it doesn't matter. But we're all healers and givers who are learning to do so from a full cup. And we would love to invite you to join us for a beautiful journey ahead. And thank you again so much, Carol, for thank you for having me.
CherylMontanez:So wonderful. Thank you.
AnantaRipaAjmera:Thank you.